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Blessings During Opposition

When I was studying to be a nurse, I was stroked and confidence in me was expressed. I was told that I was going to be good at all I tried. Nobody ever said “You’re going to hurt someone!” Frankly, that I could have caused serious harm with one mistake as a practicing registered nurse is not an overstatement! I was administering chemotherapy, blood products, and IV pain medications to cancer patients! One fast push of an IV chemo drug, and I could have seriously burned someone’s blood vessels and surrounding tissue. With one fast push of a narcotic, I could have stopped someone’s breathing! Lives were at stake if I made a mistake, and no one ever expressed doubt in my abilities.

Nobody ever told my husband he’d be a lousy college professor and researcher. In fact, when he graduated, his former professors, some now his colleagues, had fairly high expectations for his future. He is sought after by the media as a specialist in his field.  He is sought after as a speaker for subjects he does not even have a degree, but has taught himself and about which he sometimes writes. He is enough to be a church leader and teacher. Nobody told him he would be a failure at teaching other people’s children, or that he would not be preparing other people’s kids for the real world, or that he shouldn’t speak to the public about those other subjects.


In my last post about homeschooling and blessings, I wrote: “In hind sight, though, it was Kindergarten. I do wish we could have relaxed and enjoyed more. Kindergarten should be a joyous and fun filled year, not “rigorous.” I wish we had chosen to save that “rigor” for later, rather than doing spelling flash cards in the back seat of the realtor’s van as we house hunted for the second move in our new city.”

It was hard to relax when our decision for our children was suddenly under scrutiny and deemed certain for failure by others. We weren’t necessarily confident in our abilities to raise our sons, never mind teaching one of them! During the very early years of parenting, we had heard we were good, patient, “intentional” parents. After we made the decision to homeschool, some rhetoric and attitudes toward us changed.  We did not receive expressions of encouragement and confidence. Some people fell silent and wouldn’t bring up the subject of school, not even to ask “What are you learning? What is your favorite subject?” with our kids. Some told us they no longer considered us good parents. If those reactions didn’t feed insecurities, I don’t know what else would.

In the area where we’d be most investedour children and their future academic success and life preparedness-it was expected and expressed that there would be failure and long term negative consequences by my husband’s and my decision to homeschool our children. It’s (still) a rather stunning, illogical contrast expressed between predicted outcomes for my nursing career success or my husband’s career, and for the success of homeschooling our children. Especially since my nursing career lasted less than four years, and we’ve been homeschooling seventeen years! I have always been confused and hurt by this contrast.  Somehow, by teaching his own children, or allowing me to do so, my husband and I would not prepare our own children for the real world.

We’ve now graduated two wonderful young men. One of our sons graduated with college credits and has served on several short term missions trips. One has quickly earned certifications in his field–just a few months after graduating–and is earning money for his college education. Their employers tell them that they appreciate that they are self starters willing to learn, have good work ethic, and take initiative and responsibility.

Would they have learned this had they attended traditional school? Perhaps. Probably. That’s not really the point.

The point is that we certainly didn’t harm them or their futures by homeschooling, having successfully done so. But sadly, the negativity and discouraging sentiments are ones we still hear, in spite of these and other successes, and in spite of our dedication, faithfulness, proof of loyalty, and longevity to the pursuits.

We decided a long time ago that we would have to learn to be comfortable with the idea that we might never hear positive words from our naysayers. We’re proud of our children and our successes with them regardless of lack of affirmation by some. We’ve definitely had support, affirmation, and help from many, many others. We’ll always be thankful for that!

A blessing in the discouragement is that we have learned lessons in fortitude, perseverance, and endurance in opposition.

We have not been disobedient children, dishonoring those who parented ahead of us.

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Prayerful Obedience

We’ve obeyed what the Lord made clear to us after we prayed. As we were prepared by the Lord to hear His directions, we obeyed what His plans were for our family.

He has blessed our obedience.

We’re proud of our family. We’re proud of our service. We’re excited for our children’s futures.

May they honor the Lord in the way He leads them, too. And may we never disparage them or discourage them from doing so. 

Blessings,

Deb

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Background and Counting Blessings

We have been homeschooling our children since July 1999. Yes, we did begin our then Kindergartner’s school experience in July. I laugh at our over zealousness now, but then we felt we needed to get a jump on his schooling. He could already read. He was getting bored with preschool and continuing to learn the colors, letters, and numbers he clearly already knew.

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Stock photo from Pixabay.com

We were moving at the beginning of August. We would be living in a hotel for a few weeks, and knew we’d need to have something to do while stuck inside. Plus, we were expecting a new baby in early October that year, moving at 32 weeks. Yahoo! That’s every pregnant mother’s dream come true, right?

As it turned out, we moved twice in six months after living those weeks in a dirty short term housing suite situation. Our first apartment in our new city was 900 square feet packed with 2 small boys and their toys, an infant who cried for three months, a stressed out mommy with a health scare, no friends or church, and bare bones household goods. It was good to have started school early during those difficult transition days of life!

“Home” schooling gave us routine and a sense of new normal in a place that felt nothing like home.

In hind sight, though, it was Kindergarten. I do wish we could have relaxed and enjoyed more. Kindergarten should be a joyous and fun filled year, not “rigorous.” I wish we had chosen to save that “rigor” for later, rather than doing spelling flash cards in the back seat of the realtor’s van as we house hunted for the second move in our new city.


We fully expected to only homeschool for one year, get settled, and then figure out the best educational option for our children in the new location. At the end of the first year of school, finally settled in the home we thought was for a long term, we realized that we had already been led to the best option for our own children. Seventeen years later, we still love schooling our children at home, and we’ve been able to give them different experiences and a love of learning, in spite of and because of hard things that have happened.

We have graduated two children, but still have two children working through high school level work, one in middle school, and one in elementary school.

One of the areas in which we feared failure back in the early days was math. We wanted children well grounded in math and writing skills. It took about three years to find elementary level math curriculum that worked with my teaching style and was flexible enough to work with each member of our growing family’s different learning styles. We loved what we chose, but the curriculum didn’t extend into middle or high school. We had a few years of middle school floundering, figuring that out with our older boys, and while that was a completely successful endeavor, it was hard on me and my time with an infant or preschoolers in the mix. One of our now graduated sons was able to earn college credit in math before the end of high school.

Finding middle/high school math curriculum for the rest of our children that bridges well with my time constraints of teaching several different levels, trying to run a home based business, managing our home and property, and still prepares for the academic rigor we strive for in our children’s high school years in preparation for college and life is no easy feat! But I did finally find one this past year! The problem is that it is a little more expensive than we are prepared to pay. I prayed for a used, but newer version of the Algebra curriculum to prepare our girls for the next textbook I plan to keep using in high school, and I found it used earlier this summer. I needed a replacement for the same Pre-Algebra middle school curriculum, though.

We’re beginning to make progress in debt retirement. Our goal has been to pay cash for all of 2016-2017 online classes, curriculum, or supplies. My husband and I have been successful so far! Last week, I ordered all homeschool curriculum, except this one Pre-Algebra math curriculum, and we’ve paid cash for it all. We’ve paid for three online classes in full without using credit cards.

I prayed that someone would be offering the Pre-Algebra math curriculum used by our next pay period. The day after I specifically prayed for this, a woman in our homeschool community advertised the very curriculum I’m looking for in our group, and at a price point for which I was also praying.

I shared this with Dr. P last night. He asked how much it was going to be. I said “One hundred dollars, and I have no idea how we’re paying for it. We don’t have the cash for it until next week. We need to pick it up in the morning. I’ve prayed for the money.”

He said “Well, today I got a royalty check for some writing I’ve done. It is exactly enough to cover the curriculum in cash, AND still pay my self employment taxes.”

Thank you, Lord, for the blessings of our curriculum, for the finances to be available for curriculum, for tutors to come alongside us when we’ve needed them, for answers to prayers in all of our homeschool journey, and for the blessing of learning perseverance and endurance in this homeschooling race.

We’re gearing up for year 18 of Legacy Academy!

Blessings,

Deb

PS. We had an oven fire this morning, and now our oven won’t get up to temperature. Two burners on our stove top already burned out and in order to not spend money to replace those, we replaced the original coils back. The other two burners are smooth top. Our refrigerator died last month. Guess what we’re praying for in our finances next? Refrigerators and stoves are not just modern conveniences in a home, you know? Pressing on in spite of opposition from the appliance devil.

 

 

A Lesson From The Robins

We had a sweet Mama robin bird build her nest under our deck. It’s a great place to build a nest. The robins have been building in that same spot all eleven years we’ve lived here.

Photo of an original drawing by Thing A.

Our younger children have enjoyed observing the Mama sit on her eggs for days and days, both through the deck boards and from our walk out level. This weekend we noted that Mama bird was bringing little worms to open, squeaking beaks poking over the edge of the nest.

Sadly, this afternoon, our cats broke into the nest and kidnapped the babies. I had very sad little girls who witnessed the dirty deeds. When mother cat, Katrina, upset the nest, 9 month old kitten Uno was right below for her share of the kill. Our girls just sobbed, torn between being angry with their beloved cats, and devastated that baby birds were murdered during an act of nature.

Mother Bird remained understandably angry and upset for a couple of hours. She made a LOT of noise. Interestingly, though, a whole flock of robins came alongside her and joined the angry chorus. They tried to distract our cats by making a lot of noise, dive bombing at our cats to get them away from the nest and the dying babies, even after our cats had taken them far from the nest, and tried to get the cats to chase them into the trees.

I had no idea birds reacted in this way! I’ve never seen a flock of birds rally around each other!

It was amazing to observe them trying to help the babies and the Mama bird, and to express outrage. Normally, we hear only happy chirping and occasional squabbling.


People all around us are hurting like our Mama bird and her babies.

Friends, we need to be like a flock of robins. We need to help each other out. It’s really okay to squawk and fight for someone when necessary. Sometimes holding fellow robins or murdering cats accountable IS the loving thing to do. Discernment and wisdom should be exercised, because it’s also wisdom to know when being quiet is going to meet the needs. Not everything we think needs to come out of our mouths or onto our social media outlets. Let’s listen more to and for the needs of those around us. Let’s protect and defend the weaker ones, and those who are innocents.

My little girl grabbed her Bible for comfort. She asked me to help her find the “verses about the sparrows” so she could underline the passages. She read out loud:

“Are not five sparrows sold for two pennies? Yet not one of them is forgotten by God. Indeed, the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Don’t be afraid; you are (people are) worth more than many sparrows.”

Luke 12: 6-7

She then said “Boy, Mom. God must love me an awful lot. He loves sparrows/robins and doesn’t forget them. He knows how many hairs I have because He created me. I’m worth more than sparrows and robins.”

Comforted, my sweet girl dried her tears.

God loves hurting people more than robin babies and Mama robins.

Let’s love hurting people, even as we might also be hurting people too.

Blessings,

Deb

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